This is not a particularly profound post (which, incidentally, is not to claim that regular posts on Q are either), but having just finished Sarah Lyall’s rather delightful (if affectionately acerbic) The Anglo-Files: A Field Guide to the British, I came across this amusing story from the Blair landslide of 1997 at which a record number of women (very patronisingly described at the time as Blair’s babes) were elected to Parliament. Read more
A man has been seeing a psychiatrist for many years. It has been a lifeline for him.
But friends were shaken to see him emerge from a consultation in floods of tears, strange because this was the first time it had happened in 12 years.
When he calmed down, he was asked what had happened suddenly to bring this on.
“After 12 years, my shrink spoke for the very first time. His words were:
‘No hablo ingles.’“
Some readers will know that my current obsessions are conspiracies and suspicions. One of these days, these may coalesce into something substantial. But that feels a long way off at the moment. Ho hum. But for now, if you want some brilliant ripostes to those who suck up every conspiracy theory going, then my suggestions are twofold:
- Read, mark, learn and inwardly digest David Aaronovitch’s superb Voodoo Histories, reviewed here some months back.
- Watch, chuckle and take very seriously indeed these little gems from the wondrous archive of Mitchell & Webb.
They don’t make ‘em like this anymore. 3 entertainment heroes: Morecambe, Borge & Dawson, all passed on, but all wonderful in their different ways. And they had impeccable timing, comedic and musical.
Enjoy. Read more
I’ve no evidence to back up this claim, but I strongly suspect that those who have the news on 24/7 will go mad. Simply because 99.9% of news items (which usually consist in the urgent rather than the important) are bad – and when taken in such large doses, they can propel one into the deepest of pits. Or perhaps that’s just me. Anyway, we need antidotes, things that bring joy, delight and perhaps even a little dose of optimism. In other words, things to be grateful for.
Notice how none of my list involves spending much (if any) money. Which says something in itself, does it not…? Read more
For the time being, this is our final dip into the murky waters of Sellar & Yeatman’s classic 1066 and All That. After all, overindulgence is always wrong. Wouldn’t you agree?
Having digested the reign of Henry VIII, and then gobbled up his heirs & successors Edward and Mary, we come at last to Gloriana herself, Good Queen Bess, the Virgin Queen, the one who was to be obeyed (on pain of decapitation etc etc). These Tudors weren’t exactly a straightforward bunch. No doubt, there were post-natal attachment issues which can explain all the shenanigans.
Boys and girls, last week’s lesson was only the beginning, the tip of the iceberg. How could you possibly imagine that we had plumbed the depths of the English Restoration? There is more work to be done – not least because Bluff King Hal left quite a legacy, much of which was left much to be unravelled amongst his 3 children and successors.
mess web he weaved.
A day late, but hey. It’ll be worth it. But whatever you do, don’t use this for your GCSE history revision. [If you have done your revision, you'll see why]. Having read this, how will you ever be able to confuse the Reformation and the Restoration again? What’s more, whoever thought we’d need Hilary Mantel to bring this era to life?
Anyway, thought I would dedicate one or two Friday Funs to the sublime brilliance that its 1066 and All That. So let’s dive in straightaway, with Henry 6th and his 8 wives. Or was that the other way round? Read more
While the world out there is contorting itself into ever more yogic twists about horsemeat being found in burgers, I thought a little contribution from Graham Greene might be valid. I’m rereading his rather wonderful (dare I say it, quixotic) Monsignor Quixote and encountered this little gem in chapter 1.
After coming to the aid of an out of town bishop, the uber-parochial Father Quixote invites him to lunch in his humble abode. Having to deal with this unexpected guest provokes this conversation with Teresa, his housekeeper. Read more
This is a serious bit of randomness (or should that be randomity?) from my son (Bananamationman) and his best chum Tyler (Tee_Po).
They were at a loose end a couple of weekends ago and so crafted this raster superb and searing satire on the self-help industry. I’d even go so far as to say it was prophetic, actually. Almost pythonesque, in fact.
Watch, and be inspired. Read more
Never one to lose the momentum of a bandwagon, here are some more great moments from Charlie Croker’s Lost in Translation. All very silly and as I said last week, very unfair.
But quite fun nonetheless.
Just for a change, here are a few choice quotations from this rather fun tome, Charlie Croker’s Lost in Translation. Of course, it’s never fair to make fun of people’s mistakes in a language not their own. After all, I dread to think of all the terrible errors I’ve made when speaking French.
However, it’s a slightly different matter when it happens on official signs or notices. So here are some taken from hotels around the world.
Half term was not idly spent by Joshua and my nephew Hudson (despite consistently dismal weather). Over the week, the fused their considerable talents to produce this short, which is little short of a masterpiece (IHMO). Read more
Reliable as ever, The New Yorker Cartoon production line has produced a few corkers recently.
Couldn’t resist these. Especially the killer paisley. I’m now on high alert for this hitherto unforeseen strain. Read more
This post is not motivated simply by beaming paternal pride – I also got to have a cameo role in Joshua’s latest triumph… albeit as banana. And I got to be musical director. I have to say that I doubt my acting career will ever get much better than this. (And don’t forget, I ‘starred’ in an oscar-winning movie). Read more
Here’s a Friday Fun with a bit of a difference. I read Jeremy Vine’s recent tome this week, It’s All News To Me. It was simply hilarious. Laugh-out loud funny, in fact. And he says it’s all true. So I guess it must be. He is a BBC journalist, after all. It’s not to say that it’s all light and fluffy – there are moments of necessary reflection and poignancy along the way (especially in the account of his years in Africa), as well as real insight as he reflects on what actually constitutes news. Read more
Humourist, polymath and wordsmith, Clive James has written this rather glorious articulation of the Schadenfreude felt by a writer at a rival’s failures. But as the poem concludes, it is clear that, as ever, there is more than simple consolation motivates him. Read more
All is not what it at first seems. It starts out like the classic boast of the school playground. But the playground is certainly not where it all ends…
Steve Turner is a wonderful poet whose poems always twist and jive with the best of them. I just wish he’d get back on the case and write some more… Get on with it, Steve!!